A guy was driving around Dublin when he saw a sign in front of a house, ‘Talking Dog for Sale.’
He rang the bell and the owner told him the dog was in the backyard. The guy went into the backyard and saw a Labrador sitting there.
‘You talk?’ he asked.
‘Yes,’ the Lab replied.
‘So, what’s the story?’
The Lab looked up and said, ‘Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the Garda about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.’
‘But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a load of puppies, and now I’m just retired.’
The guy was amazed. He goes back in and asked the owner what he wanted for the dog.
‘Ten euros.’ the man said.
‘Ten euros? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?’
‘Because he’s a liar. He never did any of those things.’
(Joke from Grove Books)